As I sit here tonight, I've only had this feeling twice in my life. I'm so incredibly nervous, excited and, well, unsteady.
In August of 1992, my Dad drove me to Harnett Central High School for my very first day. I remember riding through town as he talked, all the while concentrating on breathing as I was so unbelievably nervous, I just knew I was going to hurl. I remember how bright that morning was; how blue the sky was and just how suddenly "different" everything seemed. As we crossed the Cape Fear, my Daddy told me a story. He said that the sky reminded him of waking up in basic training for the Air Force, thousands of miles from home where he was nervous and homesick like he'd never experienced. He recounted the bus to the Base in Colorado and went on to recall how they would play "Nothing Could Be Finer..." in the morning over the P.A. system. He said he would stand outside and look at the sky and just long to be back in NC. Then he started talking about the pancakes. He told me that they were like lead just sitting in his stomach after morning mess hall. I suddenly remembered how heavy my own breakfast felt (pancakes, no less) in my stomach as we proceeded on to my first day in the "big leagues". I'd spent my primary/elementary and middle school years with pretty much the same group of people. We knew each other; we even knew the parents, the siblings, etc etc. But we were all heading to high school. Everything was changing. There were three different middle schools of people all coming together to be the Freshman class. New everything. Big, crazy school and tons of people in one building that wasn't my same safe peer group.
In August of 1996, my Daddy drove me to Raleigh to start NCSU. I was so nervous and homesick that after my Dad helped me move into the dorm, I actually got someone to come and get me from Raleigh and drive me to my brother's house in Bunnlevel. My parents had gone to the beach and I was hell-bent and determined that I wasn't ready for college, to make new friends and live that far away from home. I couldn't leave my safe peer group. I'd survived high school and my friends group had grown quite a bit. But it was still small. And NCSU was overwhelming beyond measure. My parents came home from the beach and my poor Dad had to drive me (again) back to Raleigh and told me I had to stay this time. He, again, told me the story of the pancakes in Basic training. I vowed to never eat the pancakes in the dining hall at NCSU. And, I can safely say I never did. Ha!
I made it through both life-altering experiences. I came out stronger, forever changed. I had new friends, I was smarter and I was grown up. I took on jobs and grew my career. I've made new friends and grown an incredible network of colleagues. Now, here I am, just wondering how this next adventure is going to go. I've worked for small and smaller companies and tomorrow, I will become part of a workforce of almost 15,000. Am I crazy? Do they have the right girl? (Did they call the wrong candidate?) Yes, I've actually considered the latter.
But my experience has brought me to this point. I'm going to set my alarm early, leave early to make it through the usual insane traffic and walk in with my head held high. My confidence and my knowledge landed me this job. If there was ever any time in my career that I'd made it to the "big leagues", this is it. My new boss wrote me a few days ago (for the third time since accepting the offer) to let me know how excited the team had been that I am joining them tomorrow. She actually used the phrase "counting down the days"! Is this for real?
One thing you can count on, though....I am NOT having pancakes for breakfast. ;)
<3 LG
Life IS Good
